Rebirth Realist Gifts

'You know, I think this is my most boring reincarnation ever!'

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"It's a Wonderful Life" if it was written by scientists.

Phoenix

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

"I hate this time of year."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

City Bar and Grill - "Stop worrying, youth and enthusiasm can't compete with experience and treachery."

Recession

"Could you spare some change for a guy fresh off welfare?"

Woman talking romantically whilst man talks about measuring the scullery.

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

"Goodbye cruel world."

Squeezing a tight budget...

US Dollar weakens.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

'The bad news is that the dollar is down -- the good news is that nobody seems to have any.'

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

"Hawaii Five-O" is back? Yeah, but they should call it "Hawaii Version Two Point-0."

"You say that the best thing I could do for my health is to give up alcohol. Let's talk about the second best..."

Warning Being Alive On This Planet May Cause Cancer

"I need the saw again."

"What happened to consumer confidence?"

Hang fire on the Champas. Just a glimpse of green roots, so, a small glass of sherry.

'On jobless...on foreclosed...on worry and insomniac!'

'I'm sorry I have to let you go but since this a global economy, you may rotate back here someday.'

"It's no good, Martin, it's still in the room."

Businessmen looking at a green shoot.

Stock market full recovery?