Reality Tv Commentator Gifts

"There's a programme about people watching TV on the other channel."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

'I just love this new reality show, TRADING BANK ACCOUNTS!'

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

"Am I through to the next round?"

America's funniest election gaffes

Derren Brown: Pushed to the Edge

nstead of looking at fish bowl, a kid watches the fish on TV as they are being video taped.

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'Let's see what the employment tribunal has to say about that, shall we?'

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

'You're not being fired Jenkins. It's just that all our colleagues have booted you out of the company.'

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

X Factor contestant dressed as a 'Y'.

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

I can now come clean. The person who secretly told me that Mitch McConnell loves Dr. Pimple Popper is … Hold it! Hold it? Commercial break. Nothing' says sexy like cholesterol.

'Dear, you're not supposed to take it seriously...it's a reality show!'