Rat Connoisseur Gifts

Mice face death by magnum.

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

Miami Mice

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

'Uh-oh, Ben's making his move on Goldie's food again.'

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

"Why 'Black Death'? Why not 'rodent-related'?"

"I know the cat's away but why don't we watch a couple of boxsets, order a pizza and grab an early night."

"What the?! Have you read about the Schrodinger's cat paradox? That's really twisted dude!"

"You're amazing!"

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"It's only the wind."

Year of the Rat

The Pied Piper is mobbed by fans.

Celebrity anagrams: Is a salt water rat (Answer: Alastair Stewart)

3 Bottle Banks - Clear, coloured and rum bottles.

Experimental Free Range Guinea Pigs For Sale.

"Please continue as a lab rat, we have five mouths to feed!"

The Butcher of 35th street.

'All the rice you can eat... with one chopstick.'

"The wings help. Now pick up the bowl and I'll chase it around the room a bit."

(Pirate about rat): 'We became buddies when they threw me in the hole.'

Stand-up comedy while you're away at work. 'What's the deal with fetching? ...And they expect you to run and go get it, so why did they throw it in the first place?' 'Ha! Ha! It's funny because it's true!'

"This stuff worked pretty well on me."

"Hang on a minute! This is not for us: he's bought himself a pet rat!"

Mice Cutting Up A Cat's Tail

Smiling rat.

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

"I hope you work out better than my last roommate. He had backaches, dizziness, and an erection that lasted four hours."

The ultimate in rodent paradise.

'I can smell a rat, sergeant!'

'Couldn't you, and your ... your naked fur go sit somewhere else?'

101 uses of a dead cat: lectern

Hamster.