Randomness Scholar Gifts

The cruel hand of fate...

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"Your assumption that a one in a million chance event MUST be a miracle shows you drastically underestimate the total number of regularly occurring events."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.

"I didn't find out quite what I wanted about the economics of democracy but I did find an interesting article about the mating habits of the Patagonian Fruit Bat."

Bizarre sequence of computer-generated random numbers

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

'Today's Odds' sign above a copier showing various odds for machine's malfunctions

"Woah - random!"

Google Magazine

Market Research - "I'm trying to remember to pick up a loaf of bread, but there's a 38% probability that I'll forget."

'I don't know if you're a mathematician but my wife's not happy with her Poisson distribution.'

'About this experiment for generating random numbers - each time you do it, it comes out different.'

'You have reached the Heisenberg Institute - Calls will be answered in random order.'

"Caution! Now entering the margin of error."

The statistician marrying the probability expert...

"At random IS the plan..."

"You have reached the Heisenberg Institute. Your call will be answered in random order."

"Let's face it, you could back the wrong horse in a one-horse race!"

'I'm just calculating the probability of my getting tenure in this university.'

Fact-finding Tour Inside Joe's Head

Murphy and his brother 'sod' at work on their now famous law.

STRIP Hambone: Random Number Generator

Probability: 10,000-1, 150-1, 6-1, 2-5, 1-20, 50-1, 10,000-1.

"You are already a winner and can now go forward to our grand draw"

"This is a mine of useless information."

The Man Who Knew Way Too Much

Great Moments in Evolution

'It's like shooting fish in a barrel, except you're in Vegas and the barrel's in New York.'

WOW! That was random!

'How do you want it - the crystal mumbo jumbo or the statistical probability?'

Risk Analysis: ".037%"

"God, you're so random."