Railways Gifts

Train Timetable: "If I were you I'd get a car."

'As a steam enthusiast, a stair lift wasn't enough for Martin, he installed his own funicular railway.'

'I'm a little surprised you got planning permission.'

'This Mouse is going to be huge!'

"Oh, those are the lobbyists who get us our government subsidies."

'I understand you're looking for engineers.'

Pound sign on rail tracks.

'We met in a railway station...'

'Yup, you got a training wheel 'til you're used to running on one track.'

Credit Mobilier Scandle Rocks the Republican Party

"How much?!... I'm sorry, I think there's been a misunderstanding. I only want to buy a ticket, not the train!"

A Dog In A Train Carriage.

"It's not the fast track I had in mind."

Wrong side of the tracks.

A trevor of trainspotters

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

Trainspotter spotting: 'Gosh! A type 406 with original thermos.'

"Sorry mate, last train's gone."

Rail fare increases.

HS2 Leeds Cancelled

"I think you were right---we should have taken a left back there."

"Late, as usual."

'Railtracks new safety measures are in place'

When moles dream...

"We apologise that the train on platform 3 is leaving on time"

"No, on second thoughts, let's walk"

Railway worker: 'JESSE! QUICK, call Central Control!! We've got ourselves a runaway TRAIN!!'

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

'Madam Miggins is the best we can do for working out the full costs of HS2...'

Great rail disasters: 'Privatisation.'

Dr Beeching

'Of course you can't understand a word he says, he's the station tannoy announcer.'

"Which way is track nine?"

Sketches I have done from a train

'Come back! Initiation ceremonies are for apprentices, not station masters!'