Railroads Gifts

"Hi! It's me...I've gone off the rails"

Coupler Counselling

'Will you knock it off! You're getting out of line.'

"Don't you love that new handcar smell?"

Today I directed a band while working at my railroad job and holding a broken electrical wire together. You're a conductor!

'Have you been waiting long?'

Michigan Central Train Trapped in Snowstorm

"Where did this thing come from? It's a major trip hazard if you ask me!"

Mark Hopkins

Bowling Alley Hostages

"Yes, I'm sure you didn't stop at the railroad crossing."

Torn paper train

HS2 time bomb...

Railroad Ties

'Now What?' "Now, on to Denver."

"I don't know if you're aware of this, but we don't need GPS."

Clowns carry out railway line maintenance.

Chauncey Depew Disgraced by Reaction to Tunnel Construction Accident

Trains. Tracks 7-20. You got a job cooking Chinese food in the diner car? Yep -- I've been woking on the railroad!

Did you know there's a growing worldwide system of rails and roads that all lead to China? Did you know China's on the verge of dominating the industries of the future? Did you know China's built fifteen mega-cities? It's like having fifteen New Yorks. Did you know China's building immense undersea tunnels and super-fast high speed rail to create the world's first super-cities that'll be six times the population of New York? Oh, well ... I'm sure we're still number one in all the areas I didn't

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

The little infrastructure that couldn't

Hogwarts Express

"So, you've been working on the railroad all the live long day. Any other recent experience?"

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

A trevor of trainspotters

'This Mouse is going to be huge!'

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

'Trains traditionally run late, it rains on bank holidays and Yorkshire pudding is a main course.'

HS2

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

Run from the hills!

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

An Appreciation