Rail Worker Gifts

Clickety Clack! Clickety Clack!

"I'm not sure which side wants to open the doors to negotiation and which side closes them."

'Stop saying 'how high?' until I say 'jump'.'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

'I'd give you a raise, but I had to throw tantrums to make my parents give me anything as a kid.'

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

Off Duty.

Now may not be a good time,he just found out he's not going to live forever.

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'This Mouse is going to be huge!'

Around here it got a little tricky...

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

Latest Railway Marvel.

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'Jones, I don't like you because it's so hard to find something to blame you for!'

"The boss expects us all to be robots."

Snails on road - road works 'slow' sign.

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'

'Goodness, the potholes are deep this year, aren't they?'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

"I'm not asking for a raise. All I'm asking for is a little warmth and human understanding."

'A word in my office Jones.'

The next fast train has gone.

'He always has your back - - - but it's mostly to step on.'

'I can assure you we take privacy concerns very seriously. Now, on your way out, shut the bloody door.'

Hirer to employee handing him lighted hat: 'You'll be starting at the bottom.'

"He's in a meeting, but you have 25 seconds to leave a video message."

Boss and worker communicating in exclaimation marks.

The boss yells at me whenever I try to think outside the box! He's giving you some constrictive criticism!

Corporate Cafeteria. I don't care how many toppings you pizza has --- eating it is not multitasking!

The boss is truly a courageous risk-taker. Only he tasted the salmon mousse at last year's company picnic.

Are you nodding yes, or nodding off?

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."