Quirky Travel Planner Gifts

'Some place muddy.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

The Hall Of Mirrors Jeretski Palace, Plovdo

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

Introducing Piza Island.

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

'Are we broke yet?'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"Frankly, I never would've figured you for an S.U.V. person."

Fall on a desert island

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

Public footpath on a desert island.

"You like long walks in electrical storms too? Wow! We get a charge out of the same things."

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

"Here's something for all you animal lovers out there..."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

Lavatory Waterfall

Thumbing a Lift.

"Enjoy your stay at the Bat Hotel. Breakfast is at 7 a.m. The guano bucket is down the hall and to the left."

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

Mummy Beggar

Man with backpack discharged on luggage pick up.

The nerds go on their first road trip.

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

Scenic View offers mountain with cherry on top.

The Porkypine Pals - Moon Business

Flight Socks.

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

Distance to horizon varies.

A mental-health spot quiz, Al: "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single … Google search of travel websites"?