Quirky Therapy Seekers Pillows

"Why don't I have a psychiatrist's couch? Funny, my psychiatrist asked me the same thing."

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

Pet a Puppy

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

'I have multiple personalities and they are all following me on Twitter.'

"I've finally found a therapist who understands options."

"Have you ever thought of just knocking this 'half-empty glass' OFF the counter?"

The Physiciatrist...

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

'I guess it was a breakthrough - My free-floating anxiety crashed.'

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

'I hate all holidays!'

Turmoil change.

"And if all else fails, wave your arms frantically."

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

"The damsels, the knights, I guess I'm just burnt out."

"Nd how did tht mke u feel?"

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

"Looting and plundering! Looting and plundering! There must be more to life!...."

'You have a fauxbia.'

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

'I'd like to help you, but I never leave the office.'

"Has anyone seen my therapist?"

"I don't know, Doc, it's just that lately I've been feeling crummy!"