Quirky Relationship Gifts

STILL LIVES - Bolt: 'It's like we were made for one another!'

A woman waits on the subway with a man in a carrier bag.

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

"You don't whisper anymore."

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

"Leon, do you think it's all psychological?"

"This is never going to work—you're a tree!"

Graffitti.

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

Face Mask Romance

'He has his pet and I have mine.'

'Flowers? From a garage? You're a darling!'

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"May we see your kids' menu please?"

"Should we try that new place in the corner?"

"My husband finally taught him to use the toilet but can't convince him to give up kitty litter."

'You disgust me; but I like it.'

"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."

"Flippin' eck Mandy, don't your parents ever go to bed?"

'I know we're supposed to be Lovebirds, but a bit of privacy from time to time would be nice...'

"You're a surprisingly good kisser for having two different dead guys' lips."

'I'll never forget the first time we met...when that gardener cut you in half with his spade.'

'I feel like I just don't know you anymore, Richard!'

"It's getting serious - he left his stuff."

ACME COMPUTER DATING SERVICE, 'She should be attractive, intelligenty, charming, and funny, or best offer.

'Is it true a Maitre D' has the authority to marry people, just like the captain of a ship?'

Intimacy - Breeding Ground for Mutual Grooming.

'Meet my significant other.'

"We met in the Galapagos."

'Do you, Optimus_!@aol.com. take thee, Sexy69@aol.co...'

"How come we don't start plagues any more? Are we one of those boring couples?"