Quirky Questions Gifts

'Is it all right for a vegetarian to wear a poodle skirt?'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

Great British Eccentrics.

Best before 65 million BC.

Funky Facts: Football.

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

A Specialty Bookstore Chain that Failed, 'Untitled Books.'

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Ostrich Curoisities

"What would you like me to play next?"

Celebrity Phrenologist.

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

Real Estate Personals

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

"Sometimes I'm sorry I ever ran away with you."

Bald man with a brush on his head

Pam collected ceramic pigs. Just one so far, but even that seemed like too many.

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

"I can never go metric. 'Al's 30.48 Centimeter Hot Dogs' just doesn't sound right."

"Nah. I'm a crow. Some jerk put bleach in the birdbath."

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

Upside down question mark hanging from fishing line.

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

"We're not all grim you know - I'm a happy reaper."

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'

"There are mysteries up here on the 13th floor. Like who keeps locking the exit door? Why is that clock always 12 minutes fast? And who actually eats the liverwurst sandwiches from that machine?"