Quirky Question Lover Gifts

'Very interesting. How many bird calls do you know?'

If a fish farts in the ocean and no one is there to smell it, does it still stink?

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"I love you, you big fool."

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"Daddy, why do people pull round pizza from square boxes and cut them into triangles before they eat them?"

The Family Joules: Part 5

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

Ostrich Curoisities

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Fishing.

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

'I see an applicant being hired!'

Dummies for Dummies.

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

Why can't you use the brains God gave you? Oh, shoot, I think this is Bob's.

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

Nobody's reding our company blog,we need you to have sex with Mrs Miggins so that we can spice it up!

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'

Rare Books / Exceedingly Rare Books / Never Published Books

This is a voice recognition service...we reserve the right to cut you off if you have an irritating nasal sort of voice.

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

'Don't be silly - I love you for your body AND your tiny little brain!'

Upside down question mark hanging from fishing line.

"Prepare yourself for a shock. The birth records reveal you have a twin brother."

Think we knew each other in a past life, Randy? I don't believe in past lives. In fact, I don't believe in the past. Or the future I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight? ... Sorry, that's Randy's line #42. Reflex. Wait, let me write that down.

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

Abandoned baby with note is left by mouse hole.

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Celestial Sadie, In the Western sky after sunset, Jupitor can be seen nearly aligned with Venus. What do you make of this? R. Yates. Excellent question. That reminds me of a long lost civilization, in which there was no such thing as a typo. Where no one ever hit the wrong key because they wrote letters by hand. Eventually, it became so obsessed with speed that it began typing everything, and so inconsiderate that it soon stopped bothering to proo

The social isolation of the entomologist...