Quirky Personality Lover Gifts

'Actually, I'm more of a control nut - not a control freak. A nut is a freak you kind of like.'

'I like Jazz dance, rollerblading and strip malls. And, well, that's me in a nutshell.'

"I love you, you big fool."

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

Real Estate Personals

"Great tights!"

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

"What a coincidence! I enjoy sleeping and running around the house for no reason, too."

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

Men's Department. I want a tie that says, "I hate ties."

The Mad Hatter finally gets taken down.

'As a hairdresser, I must say you take it a bit far.'

Bald man with a brush on his head

'I even love the way you snore!'

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

"The test results have come back - you ARE a t**t."

"Your being boring, stuffy and predictable is part of your charm."

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

"Nah. I'm a crow. Some jerk put bleach in the birdbath."

'I think I met Frank at the circus.'

"So, Mr. Igor - why do you want to be a laboratory assistant?"

She was always an introvert.

Freak Family.

Flatware Follies.

Andy Warhol

"We're not all grim you know - I'm a happy reaper."

'No, it's not one of those fake arrows. I had my head pierced.'

"This part of space feels especially weird right now."

'Never mind what big eyes I have. Just get on with the bloody eye test!'

Ass-less Chaps

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

For years Melenie stayed home waiting for the stirrup cords revival.

"You must be a computer geek, because I've never had anyone ask me to accept their 'Terms of Use' before a date."

"Because you always do that with your fingers."