Quirky Knitting Fan Gifts

"I didn't waste lockdown, I learned how to knit my new beard."

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Open House of Horrors

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

Would you make up your mind? I can't keep letting you in and out all day.

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

I always forget - Are we supposed to tip?

Never give a cow a giant straw.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

Deer Cross Dressing.

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Millionaire trapped in the body of a bum. Please help correct the situation. ?

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

The water desk

"We're out of flowers."

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

"He's at that awkward age."

'I think they make my feet look too small.'

"My grandson said I was "woke" but I'm 90% certain I didn't even nod off"

Beachy Hair

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Toast kidnapper.

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

Crossword bathroom tiles.