Quirky Home Security Lover Gifts

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

No Soliciting

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

"I forgot to turn on the alarm." "It's all right, Peedy is there."

'Beware you don't trip over him!'

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

'A-1 security from crime ... but can't stand the isolation.'

"I like to think of myself as a vital link in the homeland-security system."

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

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"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

The bulb family leaves for vacation

"Okay, what's your next, more expensive security system?"

'I can't understand how those burglars could clean out our house so quietly.'

'Your father installed a security system.'

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"I just installed a home security monitor."

'Hello, security.'