Quirky Deli Diner T-Shirts

'Order somethin' else, Mae, today's prospector ain't quite dead yet.'

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'The customer is always right...'

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

Sushi Train Spotters

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

"Give him his food."

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

"It's the Chef Surprise."

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

Man finds a python in his breakfast egg

Road Kill Cafe.

'What the devil is that?' - 'I don't know, I haven't named it yet.'

Man eating his meal with his feet.

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."