Quirky Dating Scene Appreciator Pillows

'...by using lightning and the flesh of the undead. Luckily, he turned out to be a charming fellow and brilliant raconteur.'

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

"You don't whisper anymore."

'Next, time, we'll meet at my place.'

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

Alligator Bars

"I'm gona level with you, Judith, I've spent some time in the pen."

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

Woman finds sensitive mechanic to date.

'I fu*@!Ng hate you!!!'

'If it wasn't for you darling - I think I would go crazy!'

'You disgust me; but I like it.'

Spud dating.

"I like anything but long walks on the beach."

"Well, Arnold, it's been fun."

"Our violinist isn't here tonight, but Tony here will be happy to play something romantic on his cymbals for you."

'Romance-minded clown in hot pursuit of woman'

Frankie and Johnny were lovers...

'I think I met Frank at the circus.'

Here's one for you... she likes long lurches in the moonlight, scared of fire... enjoys terrorizing villages...

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

'You must be Olivia.'

"I'm a fancier of dogs and interesting men."

"So tell me again where you're from."

Florist. You're taking your new girlfriend to the aviary for Valentine's Day? Yes -- It's a cheap date.

'Meet my significant other.'

'Are you ready to be the winners?'

"In a world of beefcake, I'm dating tofu."

At Saltwater Sweeties Dating Service

Ventrilamatch.com

"Damn. The minute I eat a stink bug, in walks Mr. Wonderful!..."