Quirky Composer Gifts

"I call this next piece, 'Turn Off The Lawn Mower Before You Clean It.'"

"I compose using post it notes!"

Melody Cockroach.

Conductor Smokes Musical Notes.

Albert Einstein

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

We're making progress building a staff for the palace. The king's lawyer and accountant has sealed lips, of course. Putting a big heart in the charity foundation chief, and building the gardener with a green thumb were excellent choices, Ernie. But the entertainers sill need some fixes. The jester doesn't have a funny bone. I'm nobody's fool. And you have the minstrel a tin ear! Oops.

Texturing the Walls

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

The earlier, less publicized discovery of gravity by Corblatt.

Fuzz - Fuzzy writes a song with a positive message.

"I'll bet you can't name three of their songs."

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Cello player with pencil instead of bow

Children's Book Publisher. It should be good for lots or repeat sales

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Concerto, Number One, first movement."

A dog whose nose is a gun.

Indian snake charmer charms a snake.

"Well, that's right. It is a disco ball. The regular lamp is in the shop."

Annoying xylophone solicitors.

"Interested in some romantic punk rock during your dinner?"

'Our financial troubles are over, Edna. The fellas and I have formed a boy band.'

"I see the radiator's Baroque again."

A true musician will learn to improvise when his instrument is in the pawn shop.

Dead Man's Handel