Quirky Writer Gifts

'I can do something that not even my teacher can do, read my handwriting.'

Man with typewriter on toilet.

A pen rests in an ashtray.

Dear diary, I have to make this quick. I think my blog is onto us.

Indian snake charmer charms a snake.

I Do Not Have OCD

"Granted, I could have read your body of work to find out you specialize in dirty limericks before appointing you state poet laureate."

Albert Einstein

The Map of the human brain

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

'Hey weirdo, where do you think you're going?'

Suzie would later win a Nobel Prize for her Law of Special Social Relativity.

'I know it's a bit unusual, but that's where he gets all the best ideas.'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

The Chicken Who Crossed the Road, in therapy. My motives are always being questioned!

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"Don't editorialize."

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

Large print e-book.

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

The Family Joules: Part 5

The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat, and the Woman who Mistook her Husband for a New Mercedes.

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

Dreams I have had...

"Am I sensing fear?"