Quirky Careerists Pillows

"Your experience is impressive and your qualifications excellent but I'm afraid you're let down by not being the same as everyone else."

My brilliant career

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

The world's most unemployable family

Blend Schools

'I have never seen a resume prepared in pastels and oil paint. How long have you been unemployed?'

"By the way, I'm giving notice I start at Hooters on Monday."

"Well, what a coincidence, Jeff's in vermin control too!"

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

Bovine Proctology Graduation

'Of course I have to poke people, Mom! It's my job!'

Dexter Flynn, Taxidermy Attorney.

'And what do you do for a living Gary?' 'I'm a Puppeteer.'

"...I'm available for interview, at your convenience!"

"Any other skills?"

Sorry, Mr Arbutnot, I'm not interested

'There's always the circus, Ella. be a bearded lady.'

Curse of the mutant gene.

Let's see... Graduated from Notre Dame... Majored in bell ringing... Minored in stair climbing... Busted your hump for 3 years at the Frank & Stein facility conducting a brain research - Looks like you accidentally crossed out the 'R-E'. Heh.

To develop your career Doctor, you really need to specalise.. have you conciered nostrils..

Career options for fleas were limited.

Window cleaner has number tattooed on his back.

'And that's Doctor Jones, he used to be a Mechanic...!'

'Son, as I can see it, your career prospects as a pirate seem to be... hm...limited!'

Lil' Proctologist: 'The kid ain't right.'

The Artists Fall-Back Career 'It's an easy gig to get once you stop waxing.'

"Anyway, long story short, I'm a believer in the old adage 'Do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life,' so that's why I became an insurance adjuster."

"I'm an elephant podiatrist-what do you do?"

"Let's do it, let's fall in love."

"Lawyer is good, but have you ever considered a career in the lucrative world of mascotting?"

"Look – you want a new career as a fireman, that's fine. But I wouldn't wear that thing around here in the mean time."