Quirky Career Enthusiasts Gifts

Lil' Proctologist: 'The kid ain't right.'

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

The world's most unemployable family

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

Blend Schools

'Nice work, kid. Looks like you might be ready to sit up at the big boys' table.'

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'

'Get out there and keep your job!'

"Excuse me, Mr Newton, but some of the employees think that your promotion has gone to your head."

'Of course you can make a great career here! Look at me - when I started working, I was just called 'dude'. Now, only 25 years later, they call me 'MISTER dude'!'

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"

'Introducing one of our top salesmen despite his old age. . .'

"Well, what a coincidence, Jeff's in vermin control too!"

Bovine Proctology Graduation

'Of course I have to poke people, Mom! It's my job!'

"Your experience is impressive and your qualifications excellent but I'm afraid you're let down by not being the same as everyone else."

Dexter Flynn, Taxidermy Attorney.

Exciting suggestion in 'suggestion box'.

You are more than your job description.

'You don't have much of a work history, do you, Mr. Laren?'

'And what do you do for a living Gary?' 'I'm a Puppeteer.'

'You're not quite what we had in mind.'

"...I'm available for interview, at your convenience!"

"I love my job!"

'You call that ambition?'

"Well, besides 'being famous for being famous'... what life goals do you have?"

'I was so busy all my life delivering babies that I forgot to have some of my own...'

"My wife's career is in ruins... She's an archaeologist!"

"We're looking for someone with a diverse skill set accompanied by an advanced sense of passive resignation."

"Any other skills?"