Quip Appreciator Pillows

Kitty Litter

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

"You've changed."

Ace High

Sharp Eyes

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

"Mom, this is Sarah, the friend I was telling you about."

Time Table

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

Ask Sadie

"I've got a friend who thinks I'm Napoleon."

Wise Cracker

'His dad was a standup. He's a quip off the old block.'

Figure of Eight

Bored Room

Back Down

Strike A Balance

Great Urban Sprawl

Painting the Sistine Chapel. 1508. 1509. 1510. 1511. 1512. It looks great, Michelangelo, but there's one thing I don't understand. Why didn't you just paint it in the regular way and then mount it on the ceiling?

"My favorite is also 'let sleeping dogs lie'."

Bit on the Side

"This is not what I meant when I said you should try to live in the present."

"Are you binge watching again?"

Mega Phone

Michelangelo's David

Waste Not

"Freudian Slip"

Turn Coat

'These are humans. Normally they are quite harmless, but if you touch their food or make fun of their beliefs they can become VERY aggressive.'

Have a drink with me tonight. I can't I'm married. Tell your husband you're working. Tell him yourself, he's shaving you.

"I think I was a caterpillar!"

Spring Rituals

"...and this is my better half...!"