Puppy School Pros Gifts

"I said SLIPPERS!"

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

People who let their big dogs run around leash free and then say things like. . .

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

"Not a bad list kiddo, but I know them all! I've told you it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks..."

"Depressed? No doubt. Overwhelmed? Obviously. Crazy? I don't think so."

'Hey Winston, this is my dad. He's obsessed with sitting.'

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

'Don't make such a fuss woman, he's only a puppy!'

Pet owner hanging Obedience School diploma

Dogs Bring Slippers.

"Honey! He's breached the recliner! I repeat, the puppy has breached my La-Z-Boy!!"

'That beagle sure is a tough case!'

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'Ears up - wag that tail - soulful expression - he is YOURS!'

"Not until you fetch the other one."

"What's worse, that or this?"

They couldn't put their paw on it, but something about today seemed different...

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

'He's a son-of-a-bitch but he's our son-of-a-bitch!'

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'

Four Star Meal

'Forget about your pride Son: We're expected to beg...'

"Sit!"

"I'd like to help him, but honestly I have no idea who the good boy is."

'Quick! 'Tushy to the ground' stance!'

"Mrs. Tibbles, the vet will see you now."

'I'm trying to make restitution for shredding the sofa.'

'The good news is that you don't have apnea. The bad news is that Fluffy sleeps on your face.'

'Just jam one of these capsules as far down his throat as you can... WHEN you can... and IF you can.'