Pun Maestro Pillows

"Oh, just you wait till your patriarch gets home!"

'Nothing rhymes with politician!'

'His vocabulary is growing by leaps and soap bubbles.'

"Do you like my new sandals? They're open-toad."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

I will study my speling words...

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

"Bed Spread"

"Just for the heck of it, how do you plead?"

Dogs life

'You have an enlarged funny bone.'

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

"Dogs are men."

"Well yes, I'm kind of a farmer now: I farm salmon..."

'Your Grounded!'

'Sometimes, from time to time, occasionally I wish I'd never bought that ruddy thesaurus!'

"What can I say? I was an English major."

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'I wonder why my master never makes it into the Master's Tournament?'

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

Biology Laboratory: No Cellfies

"Hey, Sisyphus, when you've got a minute I'd like to discuss this progress report with you."

"I was going to tell you a joke about my snack, but I thought it might be a bit too cheesy...."

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

"He may be the principal, but he's a terrible speller."

If you think that's good, you should see the Pork Sabre!

Doric, Ionic and Platonic.

Barbed Pen

Card shark