Pun-loving Plant Person Gifts

A Flower is about to executed by Secateurs

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

Hardy Annuals

"He treated associates like he treated his plants."

"What are you in for?"

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

Flytrap nerd.

Cover my mouth when I cough? with what?

'The vegetarians are the smug-looking ones...'

Tree's Tree Nursery. Of course we can plant them. We'll be right over! $. It's the only hedge fund I can get behind. Tree's Trees.

Woolly tofu.

"Good news - he's in a vegetative state."

'He grew on me and he's been watering himself ever since!'

Robert Plant.

"Mr. Whopple, time to slow down on the veggie diet!"

Say it with cacti

"Don't worry, the pain will stop once everything goes numb."

"You know you've been acting really stuck-up ever. Since you got that stand."

Cat punishement.

'Stopped a shoplifter today. Caught him red-handed.'

'Say when.'

Cactus Hold Up

"I see you've laid out your garden."

Bathing Flowers.

"If we make it greener on this side of the river, the wildebeests will cross here..."

"Bloody cowslips!"

"I'm looking for ground beef that's organic, non-GMO, and doesn't contain meat."

'Daisys squirting-no punch line'

Undignified Exits of the Plant World

Planties

"Wordplay - transplant. I used to be a gladiola."

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

'I think one of us must be a plant.'

"Don't worry about that, the staff can't seem to keep anything alive around here."

'It appears you have dry scalp.'