Plant Humor Aficionado Gifts

Cactus Hold Up

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

"Weeds are like kids. They grow up so fast."

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Executive grows martinis in his garden.

Flytrap nerd.

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

Even garden plants like to visit.

F&E Landscape Architects. Ground cover plants are the Peter Pan of landscape design. The never "grow up"!

Woolly tofu.

Woman Planting Flowers in her Snow Covered Garden.

"Don't worry, the pain will stop once everything goes numb."

"You know you've been acting really stuck-up ever. Since you got that stand."

'He grew on me and he's been watering himself ever since!'

Say it with cacti

'Say when.'

Mystery vegetable growing in plot.

Bathing Flowers.

"I see you've laid out your garden."

I've discovered green fingers are of little help if you've got bad breath.

"Bloody cowslips!"

'You haven't been talking to it, you've been nagging it.'

...wait a minute. It's not really National Hot Dog Day?!

Flower pot tries to escape to the next balcony.

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

Undignified Exits of the Plant World

"I warned him not to go vegan."

Bro Miliads

'I think one of us must be a plant.'

"Then I said, 'So what does a lesbian vegan Wiccan do for fun?'"

"Don't worry about that, the staff can't seem to keep anything alive around here."

'It appears you have dry scalp.'

"Peweeew! Drop your arms, please. Your arm pits are foul."

Chicken Soup for the Vegan Soul.