Pub Connoisseurs Gifts

'What the hell good are new federal regulations if they don't have teeth?'

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'I know it's gassy...'

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

City Boy.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Men's fragrances...

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

"Walking to the pub takes me 5 minutes, but 20 minutes to walk home." "The difference is staggering."

Professional woman in pub

JOE'S 'COME ON - YOU KNOW YOU REALLY WANT IT' BAR.

Drunken singers in a public house

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

The Reaper's Arms

"I'm surprised at you, Ted. You know we're not allowed to serve alcoholic beverages to dogs."

Wine at the Bar

"Your shout!"

The Cavern Club - "One for the long and winding road Mr McCartney?"

"My wife is trying to stop me doing my flamingo impression." "You must put your foot down! "

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

'Do not stand while the room is in motion.'

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

'It's your round.'

Pie chart of pub conversations

"Not quite what I meant when I said your presentation should include a bar chart."

"I feel a draft."

'Beer? Wassat then?'

Let's have the cod. It'll be extinct soon.