Psychiatric Parrot Pillows

Pirate has parrot for psychiatrist

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

"Have you tried biting him?"

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"I'm pleased that you have finally come home, I can't get the parrot back into its cage."

'Ok, who's been playing rap music in front of the bird?!'

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

Hello City Pound? Please take my dog away.

Parrot

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

"Do you think we should get a pet?"

'Man, you totally passed out last night, so we marked on your head.'

"…And what do you think the cracker might represent?"

"The real question is do you really need a cracker?"

"Well yes, I've been away for a long time, but you knew I worked on a Pirate Ship when we got married..."

Bird flu parody of Monty Python's 'Dead parrot sketch'.

'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'

The Conveyance of a Corkscrew Hand

'I'm afraid you're just going to have to accept that dogs just don't like you.'

Pirate trying on parrots.

Polly's 217 Years' Birthday Party was very Successful until Mrs. Wilson lit the Birthday Cake

"In five years I see myself sitting on the shoulder of a successful pirate captain."

'Take your eye patch and that stupid parrot and your wooden leg and get out.'

"The parrot you sold me will only through his lawyer!"

"I was unreliable in a previous lifetime."