Proud Housekeepers Gifts

Clean House

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"I didn't spark joy."

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"I had to skip my workout."

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

But does he dust anything at our home? Noooo

"This is your new solar powered dryer?"

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

Bathroom Fairy

'It comes with three settings. Single, Married, and Children.'

Cook and her Maids

"Have you been using 'Vanish' again?"

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

The household cavalry

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

TV and cleaner

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

Housewife: Out of Order.

"I spent the whole day cleaning the house. My cleaning lady comes tomorrow and I didn't want her seeing things like that!"

I'm organizing the house. Can I help? Do you have any storage bins for stuff we don't use very often? Hold on. I have just the thing! Thanks, mom.

'You only said to bring home a feather duster. You never said what kind.'

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

"...when you're through in there, my kids room could use a demonstration too."

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

"And it comes with a coin filter for when you vacuum under the cushions."