Affectionate Homemakers Gifts

Romance over the iron boards

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

Baker Romance

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

On Valentine's Day, sometimes you don't need cards, candy or flowers from the ones who love you.

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

'Hey! By appointment only!!'

Romance over the Irons

"It's not much, but we've made it our own living hell."

'Dang! The water's expired.' (Spring Water).

"I can't remember if they turned me off or not"

Big Name Foreign Rugby Players Are Going Home.

'Catching them young' Man reading to child in bed '...seven maidens, four wickets for sixty...'

Clean House

"Another unpaid nightshift! Please tell me you at least secured the video rights?"

Maid.

Cut out and keep your own Butler.

"Don't even think about letting them in until the house is dirty again."

Statue of a housewife.

'The meaning of life? Sorry, kid, you're on the wrong mountain - I'm the guru of handy household tips!'

Beaver cleaning a carpet.

"Officer, the washing machine ate my brother!"

Un-realtor

"Did we have visitors today? Wait! Let me guess! Tia Delia...cousin Esther...and Tia Zulema."

'My children always seem to move back - they like their home comforts.'

'If I could choose I'd like to be my son.' 'When I grow up I want to be like my dad.'

Picture of missing sock on milk carton.

'Well, you would go on about wanting her as a stay-at-home wife!'

House.

'That's the last time I ever let you try to fix the microwave.'

"Are you sure that our health insurance will cover any consequences from kissing grandma?"

Milfred enjoyed standing in the middle of shopping malls and being a love directory.

'I hate grocery shopping.'