Proud Chef T-Shirts

'I feel so proud. Dad says my cooking is just like Mum's.'

Butterfly Woman

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

The Origins of Everything

Keith Floyd.

Witch's Brew.

'Come and get it!'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken

Christmas Canapes

'I know it's daring, but I always try one new recipe for Thanksgiving dinner.'

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

Baker

"For the next Christmas party pot luck, let's skip the finger foods."

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom or night will stop Ed from overcooking the fish."

"Not the Verity Brewster? The Verity Brewster who invented sweet-potato casserole with marshmallows on top?"

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'

'It looks exactly like the picture in the recipe book except for the burnt bits.'

'Sue, the poltergeist has made us another cake.'

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that,'

Lobster potion.

MasterWitch

'Caution: raw eggs!'

"The usual"

'And this is Mario Batali. Of course, he's not the Mario Batali.'

Home on the Range.

"Plus cute. Did I mention extremely cute, for a fusion chef?"

'Ready, Steady, Cook!', with a cow contestant.

"Al dente!"

Paradigms: Gravity - Evolution by natural selection - A watched autoclave never boils.

'Using my knowledge of structures and function I built this sculpture!'

"For heaven's sake, all I asked is which do you want, a hamburger or a lamb chop!"

'Well, Bill! Looks like you won't be complaining about tonight's dinner.'

"Now I have your attention, when will the dinner be ready?"

"Don is more like network, and Evan is more like cable."