Prophet Fan Pillows

'Okay, now I'm hoping he's right...'

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

"Tomorrow will be mainly sunny, but with some scattered showers..."

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

How they did it . . .

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

"Well. . . either it's sinking, or you got the measurements wrong. . .!"

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

"Call yourself a fortune teller? I've never even heard of the Cairo museum!"

'At a guess I'd say it's one of the lesser Pharoahs.'

The end is near - well, at least for the sandwich board guy.

'I know it looks silly, but they say his prophecies have regained their old accuracy.'

'Of course, the future isn't what it used to be.'

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

Before becoming the legend that he is today, Nostradamus first enjoyed a pretty good living at the tracks.

"One day son, all this will be going with me."

Mummies for Dummies

"Your life will soon resemble a soggy old clump of leaves."

"Why do you need to know if I've made a will?"

A self-filling prophecy.

Doomsday marketing

John Calvin

Information desk manned by a fortune teller.

The End is Near/Just the Beginning

'Tut, you've outdone yourself this time.'

"That one's for his cat."

"@FBarnes12 favorited a prophecy you were mentioned in."

"The end of the world is nigh."

"Covid again!"

Sidewalk Prophet

A watched kettle never boils.

"That one is for the Pharaoh, and that one is for his cat."

"And it shall come to pass, Great Caesar, you shall have a salad named after you"