Promo Ninja Gifts

'Please take this flyer.'

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Freedom of the press

'Memorable miracles' from 'burning bush' to 'low cal ice cream'

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

Be the grass...

The reason why moments like this are utterly wasted on advertising people...

Reporter #2: plant.

Business Cards.

"I'm sorry, sir. No outside food is allowed in the theater."

4 x 4s - buy one, get one free.

Man overloaded with samples

'I'll still advertise the car in the newspaper,if it is alright with you Mildred.'

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

'...and that concludes the emergency procedures. Since we have a few minutes before take-off, how many of you are familiar with 'Amway'?'

"Madam, you're not properly dressed. . . But the rules say helmets must be worn at all times."

"Any chance you could block the Home Shopping Network?"

"The local karate club must be fund raising again."

"Oh wait, we need to be on the 1-9 North bound escalator to get to the food court."

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

"Remember when he was little and we couldn't get him to eat? Now he never stops!"

News Samurai

Bank goes back to cheap toasters as free gift.

"Actually, I wasn't paying any attention to what you just said, but I LOOK interested and engaged, don't I? Cosmetic Eyebrow Surgery!! It's totally changed my LIFE!!"

Precisely when did you first start feeling invisible in meetings?

The Commandos go shopping

Newspaper falls out of pile of junk leaflets.

Amazon Obstacle Course: Online Shopping Gamifies Your Building Entrance.

'Please take this flyer.'

The speech was almost interesting. People began to sit up and fake interest.

Ninja convention

For some reason, Bob's use of his favorite New Yorker cartoons to enliven his presentation wasn't getting the laughs he'd anticipated.