Budget Ninja Gifts

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

'I'll be back later -- I'm going to the mall to practice my sales-resistance techniques.'

Don't forget. It'll help you to work out if you can afford the things you really need.

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

'I'd like to return this, please.'

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"Your repayments start now!"

Book Thief in True Crime Department

'Hey, I told you this place wasn't easy to get into.'

"This is Thompson, he has a black belt in budget control."

'It says take all your medication - if you can afford it.'

"Better than Chekhov"

Be the grass...

Service. Diagnostic Testing. It looks like your odometer computer hacked into your fuel injector computer.

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

"Your book is a masterpiece, but, unfortunately, we're rather picky."

"We're looking for fresh, exciting, independent voices which are very similar to those of our existing bestsellers."

'I've decided to narrate my own like in the third person today', he said - 'Oh, God. Not this again', she uttered plaintively. - 'Shut. Up.', she bellowed threatiningly at the fleeing man.

'Well, now that you've found a cure, all our funding will be sent to another division.'

Working the bugs out of his spear invention

Bridge Repairs

Information War

"I'm sorry, sir. No outside food is allowed in the theater."

'Wall Street' 'Dip'

'Of course, there'll only ever be a market for seven original stories.'

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

"Any chance you could block the Home Shopping Network?"

"Remember when he was little and we couldn't get him to eat? Now he never stops!"

Electronics. It's a great idea, but nobody makes campaign-canceling headphones.

"Oh wait, we need to be on the 1-9 North bound escalator to get to the food court."

'How can I possibly save for retirement when you're paying me minimum wage?'

"I just found out what braces cost."

'Before I give you my bill, I warn you - I'm a black belt.'

A Real Find

Amazon Obstacle Course: Online Shopping Gamifies Your Building Entrance.