Project Planner With A Laugh Gifts

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

God's Subcontractors

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

Make your resolutions achievable.

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

"I might just get a pie."

Waiting for retirement.

'We're a non-profit organisation. We didn't plan it that way, but that's how it worked out.'

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

"I'd love to sit down and discuss my project with you some time. Let me check my calendar and I'll get back to you."

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

The Best Laid Plans

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'Dad, perhaps the fan should suck instead of blow?'

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

'Why do it the easy way when you can do it the right way?'

We thought we'd put in the detail later.

Biblical Procurement Tales: Project Ark.

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

"It's a game where we roll the dice to see which destination wedding we should spend our savings on this year."

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

Wedding cake figures having marital problems.

Nerdville: the beer coaster project.

'I hate to rush you, but I'm getting a leg cramp.'

"This is where the party budget ran out."

"I don't know - seems like a lot of work."

'Wait a minute! Aren't you the chap who refused planning permission on the St., Mary's church extension?'

'But tonight is going to be romantic. We'll drink a bottle of wine while I work on my bike.'

No Nesting

"I have a low-cost project you can which you can involve yourself with."