City Planner Humor Gifts

No Nesting

Sign Reform

"I see no problems. We can get lots more of these houses in.."

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

This site acquired for yet another housing development.

Slums of the 'Devil's Acre'

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

Pedestrian parking only.

"What what of all the dates I couldn't save, Jimmy."

"Was it someone you ate?"

Don't walk on the grass.

In it for the long haul.

The citizens of Fullerton, Nebraska, celebrate the historic meeting of East and West Coast Suburban Sprawl.

'The Mayor is going to be thrilled -- I found a way to fill potholes with toxic waste!'

"... Till death us do part."

'Got anything smaller?'

'Just three pieces of cake for 200 guests?'

"We need a vacation..."

'Remove this - it's libelous!'

'Lorna?! Jack?! So how long has THIS been going on?'

Unsocial housing.

"Great, but where are they going to get the money to pay for them?"

"I thought about what you said and I've outlined a plan."

Pavements: Bins, Pedestrian, Vehicles.

'Seven days' free approval or no - I tell you it's stuck!'

"Of course contributing to Sally's wedding gift is strictly voluntary...naturally I'llave to list you as not contributing on the company website!"

Get Off My Sidewalk

Old Cheltem, Cheltem, New Cheltem, New Improved Cheltem.

'It's a new idea - a cell phone booth, where people can talk privately without disturbing others.'

"I live near Montauk point but I like to get into the city as often as possible."

'Hello, I'm the city tax appraiser and it has come to our attention that you have added a bird house to your yard.'

No entry

'Parking is always such a problem in this town.'

'It's perfect! A clean environment, a public transport system that really works and a downgoing unemployment rate at the same time!'

'Do me a favor, next time you want to go golfing in the city, count me out.'