Profit Prayer Pillows

'. . .and may the dividends tomorrow be good . . .'

Grace For Flies

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

A child interrupting family prayers

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

Monk Prompt

Smiling businessman with rising profits

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

'It wouldn't hurt to say a few words.'

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"Oh, I can't complain"

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

"You really shouldn't ask for material things like a bike. At least try for a Porsche."

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

"Amen. Please help me up."

"Sure, I pray all the time... English test, Math test, History test...."

"This might take awhile, Lord."

'Now think, Harris, what did you do different on that day?'

"Pray only for peace, love, strength and forgiveness. Never, ever spam the Lord."