Office Prayer Pillows

'Please give me the strength to ask for a raise without my voice breaking into an annoying falsetto and my brow all sweaty.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

Grace For Flies

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

"If you could be in any cubicle, which one would it be?"

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

Office slaves.

After a day long meeting, the decision, as usual, is made in the hallway.

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

'I've given a lot of thought to giving some thought to your latest proposal.'

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"This is Briggs, our new department head. He's got an amazing knack for reducing complex problems into easy-to-understand witch hunts!"

Lumbar support animal

"We're all just a number here, Finch, and fortunately my number is one."