Prayerful Multitaskers Pillows

The Pee and Pray - for today's busy Christian.

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"Excuse me a moment, whilst I just change hats."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

"I was finishing my homework in the shower to save time!"

Hassled Mother.

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

'How soon can I return to work? About fifteen minutes ago.'

Overloaded with extracurricular activities, Griffin's body began to grow an extra brain to cope with it all.

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

"This might take awhile, Lord."

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

Mom simultaneously feeds baby his bottle, and husband his.

Homeschooling

'It's an audio book: I'm too busy to read books...'

Having It All

"These days I do a little sub-editing on the side too!"

"Okay, I'll change your diaper, but you better not tell any of my patients."

'I spent today with out spindoctor, and boy, am I dizzy.'

"What?!"

The Swiss Arm-y Wife

"And please let Alan Greenspan accept the things he cannot change, give him the courage to change the things he can and the wisdom to know the difference."

'Who's gonna tell her she's wearing two different shoes?'

'I'm a communication expert because I can eat crisps, drink beer, read the news and talk to my wife while watching TV!'

'You've got plenty of time for a little prayer before you get to him.'

'So you could say 'I'm wearing two hats'.'

'He's trying to put three kids through college.'

"Are we allowed to pray?"

'Billy, I really don't think it's possible to do your homework and watch TV at the same time.'

"Day care worker's delight: Velcro diapers"

"I'm your court-appointed attorney, but I'm really an interior decorator."