Professional Ponderer Gifts

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"I don't know if you'll ever find a decent job!"

"Of course I envy you. I have to take them two at a time."

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

Jean-Paul Sartre

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"Needs to get a life"

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'...and that is my philosophy.'

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"I think it's wrong to hunt them when they're in a house of worship."

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"