Procrastination Punter Gifts

'We're under a lot of time-pressure here, so we'll need to jump to conclusions.'

"I take it the tortoise wasn't available."

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Research and Development: Now, Never.

"I wasn't expecting to be in here for so long."

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

The Graveyard of Past Deadlines

In and Out Box

"What does procrastination mean?"

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

"We interrupt this program to bring you a special message from your teachers..."

"You dawdle, daydream. You make lists of things to do but can't get started. You seem to be restricted from doing what you know you should be doing. These problems will dissolve when you read Chapter Ten of my new book, at eight dollars and ninety-five cents."

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

"I kicked the idea of mowing the lawn into the long grass."

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"I'm your exit strategy."

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

"The boss won't be able to make it on time. He asked us to reschedule this meeting to discuss the agenda for our next meeting where we're going to brainstorm strategies to prevent procrastination in the workplace."

I know hard work pays off in the long run, but goofing off has such immediate rewards!

"I submit to the committee the document of your unfinished screenplay, is it your testimony today that you told your wife it would be finished by now?"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

"I have to go. I have another coffee break on seven."

Robert Frost Watches One More Episode

"I'm sorry - Mr Jensen is not in the office at this time."

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

"Of course it's blank, my essay is about writer's block."

Future robots can do all the things we put off until tomorrow.

"We've discovered the part of the human brain that activates achievement is located right next to the section that governs how much you look out the window."

"Listen, if this takes much longer I'll be late for work and I'll be a dead man!"

'Not now Susan - I'm busy.'

'Danae...you seem to spend twice the time and energy in avoiding your schoolwork than it would take to actually do the work...How far do you expect that'll get you in life?'

"On days when I need to get out of bed and go to work, I close my eyes until the feeling passes."

The 1 Minute Scape Goat.