Private Chef T-Shirts

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'I sent out for everything.'

The Anti-Agent

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"How can you be out of wings?"

Come dine with me!

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

Jack of all trades

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

Counting ribs

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Lady of the Cake.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Even the waiters here are organic."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Diner.

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"