Prison League Champions Gifts

When stupid prisoners play Baseball

"White Collar Prison"

Bluewater security man stopping baby with hood.

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

Prison Governor - Trays read: In/Not if I have my way.

'Will you watch where you're going with that thing?'

Sweet Jailbreak

"Carl! I thought I'd find you here."

"No ham in this, I hope?"

"Wow! You've got free-range children."

"Put off the escape until tomorrow - I've only enough food in the house for one..."

Desert Island Inmate

"Why not become a prison officer when you're released, Dobson? We need 2,000 new prison officers; the government's keen to provide employment for ex-offenders plus you know the ropes."

"And just the name alone: 'feral parakeets'... I mean, how cool is that?"

'I'm warning you! I have friends in high places.' 'They're climbing Ben Nevis.'

"That was a nice smooth stop. My one concern is that it was right on my truck!"

'Oh my lord, they've turned into pillows!'

At his jailbreak, Bob rummaged through grit, sand loam and unfortunately and unintentionally through several dimensions.

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

"Bacon, Lettuce & Tomato—how can I help you?"

"What's your exit strategy?"

Full moon brings out werewolf in prison cell

'I'm here for trying to keep my nose clean. I got caught stealing a packet of tissues.'

"Sorry, you've got the wrong number."

"Yeah, but I had Goliath on my fantasy league team."

'Stop staring at the key! There is no way you can steal it from right under my nose!'

"Bob, Bob, he's about to open the flyscreen door! It's our chance to get out of this place!"

Santa visits prison.

Exit vent. Cell block. Climb down bedsheets. Hide behind shrubs. Machine shop. Get tools. Cut fence. Climb tower. View prison up here. Supply room. Crawl through vent. Rope ladder. This escape plan of yours might have worked if it wasn't for the going-away party! Good bye! We'll miss you.

Break-ins by the Masochist Society

"I think I found the problem...."

'Tell you what - you've really caught the sun to-day.'

Before you're released, would you mind filling out this feedback survey, so we may better serve you next time?

The great escape.

'How many times do I have to tell you? First you call a cab, THEN you rob the bank!'