Prison Film Fan Gifts

'I'm thinking of dropping out of law school.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"Can I still do my pilates?"

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

'One of the guards is leaiving, would you like to make a contribution to his farewell gift?'

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack In the Big House

Prisoner decorating his cell.

Food Chain Gang

'Before you go to prison, Sims, I'd like to give you this award as 'Scapegoat of the Year'.'

You gonna eat your pickle?

"Surely it can't be twenty-five years already!"

'I guess it all started the day my mom said, son, if you put your mind to it, there's nothing you can't do.'

"This is Cliff. He's a neo-con."

A prison with a conservatory attached.

'It's windy this morning.'

Inmate on cell phone: 'I'd like to request 'Jailhouse Rock'.'

Preferred Prisons

'I'm getting into a rut -- campaign, election, indictment, parole... campaign, election, indictment, parole....'

"Escape Thursday? But that's Bar-B-Qued pork night!"

Guys in torture chamber: 'TGIF!' and 'Shaddup.'

Prison ain't so bad- ? -aside from all the metrosexual activity.

"I had everyone fooled. Could have got away with it, too, if he had just kept his big mouth shut."

'Well, I'd best be off, Arthur, the clink of glasses behind bars and all that...'

"I got eight to twelve years, which was in line with Wall Street expectations."

'Yeah? Well you could use some deodorant, too!'

'Look on the bright side, think of all the money you saved by conducting your own defence.'

"Refusal to Obey a Police Officer. You?"

"I was making big money! Yes, an inch too big."

'Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything they didn't already suspect.'

"He stole my heart, I stole his wallet. – Now that's what I call vengeance."

'I'm a celebrity now...so get me out of here!'

"I'm in for stealing breath."

Identity theft. You?

What the?! It's all just wallpaper.

'When I first saw you on TV, I just knew you were innocent of stalking.'