Primitive Art Lover Gifts

'They describe the end of the ice age as the Big Brownout. They lost more than 10,000 tonnes of mammoth steaks.'

'Thrilling news yesterday; my nephew's got the Lascaux Caves commission.'

Before the Domestication of Cows

Primitive magician

"The invention of taxidermy."

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

'Oh-oh -- I think I've invented writer's block!'

Ape ambushes anteater hiding behind a monolith.

Cave Painter

"I think we should get a dog."

'It's an unauthorized biography of the Chief.'

Art Theft

'Like heck he invented fire -- it was spontaneous combustion from the slob's trash pile.'

Early art critic

'There is still much we don't know about interplanetary travel.'

"Do you think we could domesticate them?"

"What am I supposed to to do? It's my hunter-gatherer instinct"

Early 3D home entertainment systems.

"It's a quaint, one room, no bath, no half-bath, no basement, no windows, hole-in-a-boulder studio."

'Okay, how about THAT shade of mud?'

'We've got food, shelter and clothing.. and now you want DISHES?'

"I'm sorry, but his command of the earth tone palette is pure genius!"

"I thought a kitten would be nice for a change."

'No, it only has a driver-side airbag.'

It's called "fire"! Now we can compete in a global economy!

And THEN you're going to hang it on the wall? That makes no sense.

"Steve wuz here. Steve iz here now."

'The trouble with being so primitive is that you have to say EVERYTHING in twenty-five words or less.'

An Early Power Point Presentation.

Target

"A radical and bold departure from the usual style and subject matter, Og, but it speaks to me,"

An Ant's nest in the form of a Tepee

A skeleton in a Tattoo parlor getting the skeleton's version of the Skull and crossbones

'Well here's your problem - the wheel hasn't been invented yet.'