Prehistoric Scribe Gifts

'You know it takes time to write a novel.'

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

'It's an extinction notice.'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"Admit it, we're lost."

Another Theory as to Why Dinosaurs became Extinct.

The First Cone of Shame.

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

Early on-line shopping

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'If you want to see my resume, it's on my cave wall.'

'Your 'marriage' invention sounds good, but what if it leads to a concentration of power for the central government?'

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

So, that's bipedalism? It doesn't look very ergonomic.

A caveman rubs two sticks together and gets a computer.

'We froze him until medical science knows how to cure spear wounds.'

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

Unfortunately, napkins hadn't been invented yet, so good ideas were quickly forgotten.

'You can't believe a word he says since he invented the subjunctive.'

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

Infographics: the early years.

'The dawn of woman' - Ape-women dance around giant bar of chocolate.

"Your wheel idea was a huge hit, so what have you got for me this time?"

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'