Predictive Text Warriors Gifts

The horror of mistext

Oymoticons

Soldier armed with a pen.

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

"I wish we were just called T-Rex..."

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

'Coleridge'

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

"These days they prefer to harass me on twitter."

'When did they start giving Pulitzers for texting?'

No, boss, we still don't have an emoticon that says 'I'm laughing all the way to the bank.''

'I know it looks silly, but they say his prophecies have regained their old accuracy.'

'What's the use? Everyone has his own PC future-probability program these days.'

'Yes, a winky face is correcy...But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices know as 'complete sentences.''

'I was trying to predict future market trends and the computer blew up!'

Science vs. Literature, an Eternal Battle.

"He's joined a whatsapp group for fans of Matt Hancock's Whatsapp messages."

"We already changed our phone service to something or other last week, so we don't need whatever it is you have."

Fortune teller: 'If you want a second opinion, my sister reads tarot cards.'

"Yeah, well it hurts when you stab me with your words."

'Them's fightin' tweets!'

Cockfight of words

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

'I just got a hex message from Zelda.'

Less than Ultimate Fighting.

Redaction: The pen is mightier than the word

Woe Befall the Linguistic Interloper

'You're entitled to one text message, 160 characters max, so you better make it count.'

Smoke spelling mistake.

"What do you mean you're staying in with a good book?"

Dangerous weapons.

Opticians Sign With Modern Text Acronyms