Predator Philosopher Gifts

"Avoid hungry bears."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

"Yes, one is a dog."

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Cat Reunion

'I don't know about you. But I'm eating my fill before I drag this carcass to the 'king of the beasts'.'

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

In life there are things we cannot understand � the words 'get down,' invisible fences, cats...

"He doesn’t say much, but he thinks a lot."

"Go ahead. Fly through it. I dare you."

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

"The universe must love dogs - otherwise, why would sticks just fall from the sky?"

Shepherd, Herder, Hunter, Thinker.

"Dogs are men."

"It's just a jogger!" "It's just a car!" "There's nothing out there now!" "I was thinking of the squirrel I saw last week"

Book: 'From prey to predator in 30 days.'

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

"May you love like you've never been hurt, dance like no one is watching, and chase squirrels at the speed of light."

"I do what they tell me, I eat what they give me. How do I know they're not a cult?"

Flea Philosophy.

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

'White meat or dark?'

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

The Inner Dog.

I bark and bark and bark. . . Therefore I am.

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

"I'd skip dessert. You'll be quicker on your feet."

Human meat.

"He's obedient as long as my requests align with his internal moral imperatives."