Powerful Pensioner Gifts

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

Corporate Whore.

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.

"He was just a year away from retirement."

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

"Big choices today Mr. retired board of directors. 2 ply or 3 ply?"

"A 12 month tour of the USA costs us less than staying at home for a year."

"The only joints we roll these days are our ankles."

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"Scary stuff, but I'm not sure the world is ready for the unexpurgated story of life as a pensions adviser!"

The walking frame for the mobile immobile.

"Last one to the top's a geriatric."

"He's the most powerful man in the senate."

"Look, Honey! No teeth!"

"Show-off!"

Goodbye Party Today - Prof Whiley is Retiring to Spend More Time with his Inner Child.

New game - Aches and Bladders (Suitable for 70+).

"The pensions industry needs to dramatically improve the way we communicate with customers."

"The technical aspects of the 'dashboard' are mainly resolved. Now we just have to sort out the peripheral services."

'Hot dang! Ethel, check out Raymond's new twenty-twos!'

"Since Ronnie retired, I like to keep him busy with plenty of activities."

'Stranded on a desert island for 20 years! Well, one good thing--I'm sure my investments in AIG and Citigroup must be worth a fortune by now!'

Man trying to grab a pension from a crane slot machine

One retired businessman's...

'God has heard your political prayers but he says that the other place is full at the moment...'

"Plan B was to supplement my retirement income as a party clown, and that brings me to my loan application."

'Second childhood menu, please!'

Chasing Pensions

'Irwin, you've been retired for two years. Isn't it time you stopped being a pompous ass?'

'Looks like the trust my money is in isn't blind, but it is short sighted.'

Comedy / Tragedy / My 401(K)

'RETIRED CEO? I expressly told them to refer to me as ‘Former Strongman.''