Portion Size Warrior Gifts

Gross pig size!

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Mod Kwan Doh

"I want that dressing-room mirror fired."

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

"It boils down to which I dislike more: ironing shirts or non-iron shirts."

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

"I don't care what job you want, Bagshaw, for God's sake dress for the job you have!"

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

'I never said it was the comfy wear...I said it was the comfy look!'

"You can't see a grief counselor just because you got a 'B'."

"Is there a seamstress present?"

"I didn't know you could do worse than an F. When did they start handing out poop emojis?"

"I'm looking for a nice basic piece of clothing that can fulfill every need I have."

'You've had a bad day? Try being stuck in this house!'

'Can you wear something quieter than those old corduroys?'

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'I'd like the short form instead...'

"Sure I know what it adds up to. It adds up to another 'C' for Eddie Goldbeck."

'Why can I never find my camouflage trousers?'

"I'll have what's left of my people get in touch with what's left of your people."

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

"The doctor will see you in a week - if you could still be ill a week on Wednesday."

"Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to say how much I hate your dress."

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

"Ok, boy, one more time, then I'd better get this thing back to the battlefield."

'I tried on these jeans. I didn't think they were stretch jeans, but they stretched.'

"I'm not wearing that - it screams first day of school."

Axes 'R' Us Store

Jeans Styles

'The sequel to The Emperor Wore No Clothes.'

"Don't get mad at me - you're the one who threw your robe in the dryer."